The institution of marriage - LetsDiskuss
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The institution of marriage

Priyal Verma

@ Student | | others

The intertwining of two souls through the sacred bond of marriage is a tradition as old as time.It’s something we have been prepared for all our lives like it is the only important thing in our lives,especially for  women.Every thing about a girl is taken care of as she is to become a woman and get married someday.”Don’t eat all these sweets,you’ll get fat”, “Don’t play on the road,you’ll hurt yourself”.Similarly to boys,the taunts go like ,”study harder or no one will get you their daughter”, “don’t play so much or who’ll give you a job”.

In older times,marriage was just something like a formality that had to be done,without logic or anything for that matter.Parents used to fix their children’s marriage like it was a deal between the families.A deal for their personal gain too sometimes.Parents used their children as commodities in a barter system setup where both the parties gave something and received something in return too.Like,how marriages were done for political support,monetary support etc.The consent of their kids didn’t seem important to them which funnily enough should’ve been the only thing of importance there. The authority of the parents and the obedience conditioned into us stopped the kids from speaking out and they accepted their fate as served to them.As if this was not enough,came the awful traditions and rituals which were practiced all over.Sometimes,the giving away of the bride was not just a father walking his daughter down the aisle but it stuck to it’s literal meaning and it was rather a transaction,to sometimes settle debts.Then came the concept of kanya daan which left no room for more objectification of women.It literally means, the gift of virginity.According to hindu tradition,it was the highest honour and it was believed that it could absolve the parents from their sins.Not good enough?only male members were allowed to do so like in the absence of the father,the mother could not do it but some other male member had to intervene.Then,came the most horrible of all,dowry.It has done irreparable damage to hundreds of families and has battered apart any humanity left in us.Dowry cases were alarmingly high and all kinds of news like death,torture,etc were associated with it.It saddens me as to how families thought they had to pay someone to marry their daughters while the other side of family saw their sons as commodities to be purchased.It shocks to me my very core as to how it is still prevalent right under our noses,like an open secret in the 21st century where we apparently call ourselves “progressive” individuals.Traditions like these and the burden put on both men and women expelled the trust of them in the whole marriage institution.Another study blamed the dwindling number of marriages on women empowerment.It went on to say how the basic reason for marriage at some point was so that the women could live off of their husbands for the rest of their lives.The husbands also needed a support system for all the household chores that had to be performed for their own sustenance.But with the onset of 21st century,both women and men know better and choose to marry of their own accord where love is the only reason.