What can we do to invest in real friendships?

Now, the friendships and the ability to make friends are measured by the number of friends one has on their Facebook list. The likes and comments on your display pictures decide how social and friendly you are. And many of us are living this lie, without even realizing when the noun “Friend” changed into a verb.

So the first step towards investing in “real” friendships is checking whether we are living around the sham of friendship or not. If not, we are good to move ahead and can now ponder about the definition of real friendship.

Remember the school days when it just took a common liking of some favorite candy or superhero to initiate a friendship? And how such little things laid the foundation of an intense bond with time! Pity, it’s not that easy after we have grown up. We lack friends who would just show up at our door to hang out with us, just like they used to meet us in the park for a game of "hide and seek". It doesn’t happen anymore.

(Courtesy: apta.org)

The only definition of a real friendship is nothing but two words, “unconditional love”. When you find someone who spends time with you without any terms and conditions, and without any demands or advantage, then you can say you have a true friend. And it’s not necessarily, but it should be a give and take relationship, where they are also getting what they are giving.

Also read: Why school made friends are the best?

Spend at least a few hours in a week to talk to just one person whom you know will always be waiting for one phone call from you. Don’t take such people for granted, for they value your presence in their life and it’s the greatest honor you can ever get from anyone.

(Courtesy: vertiers.com)

So after you have learned what exactly real friendship is, you need to practice it. And you need to realize that you don’t have to do it with every person in your life. Learn to value quality over quantity, unlike they do on social media where the main aim is to gain more and more friends and followers. Don’t let social media spoil your “real friendships” for you.

Invest time in the weird things you and your friend like to do together. It could be anything –from painting each other’s face with Halloween makeup to reading books and poems to each other, or well, clicking weird selfies and recording each other’s funny videos. It could be anything that helps you break the monotony of your daily routine and make you realize the importance of your friend more and more.

Of course, such instances will be very less than the ones we used to have in our childhood. It is because of the change in priorities. In childhood, our first priority was always fun. When we are an adult, we have financial, filial, social, professional, and numerous other responsibilities. So the next step is to make space for friendship in your daily routine and give it as much importance as any other thing in your life.

Also read: Is Facebook Destroying Friendship?

Remember that adulting is not about pretending that you are happy alone. Instead, it is about realizing the need of a person who can get your back. Someone to whom you can always turn to in your thick and thin. It’s this epiphany that will help you indulge in real friendships.

Above all, you need to understand that as a human, a social animal, you can’t survive alone emotionally. You need someone beside you when you are not strong enough to face the world alone. Someone in front of whom you are not ashamed of appearing vulnerable. Remember that earning such people is important to make your life worth living.